How raiding turns you into a horrible person counter-point

I was browsing Massively this morning when I found an interesting article by Eliot Lefebvre. He basically discusses how raiding can take a perfectly normal person and turn their life upside down. There is a lot of truth to what he says but I also feel like Eliot misses some of the finer points. He gets all of the symptoms correct but I really believe the diagnosis is wrong. I would like to address his take on this with my own.

Complete agreement

One of the arguments that Eliot is putting forth is that some MMORPGs don’t really give a player a large degree of choice in end game options. “You start out going in and playing a game that you do enjoy, and through luck or a vague sense of obligation, you reach the endgame and start pursuing the only goal that the game has seen fit to provide you.” I’m not going to disagree at all here. There are many cases where you can only progress your character and the game’s story through raiding. That isn’t really what I want to debate.

The needs of the many

The crux of this argument about how raiding ruins you as a person comes from the prospect of the needs of the many. “Gradually, your presence becomes more and more integral to the success of the group.” This is certainly true. Groups of human beings tend to start relying on their skilled members to do certain tasks. If I am a good hunter and my friend is a good fletcher it is only natural that I hunt and he makes arrows. We rely on each other to succeed as a team. Eliot seems to see this as a negative aspect of raiding. “…before you know it you’re signed up for every raid for the next two months because damn it, the group needs you.” It doesn’t matter if you’re raiding, grouping, crafting, or role-playing, this sort of thing will happen. Humans have a natural tendency to band together into groups. Their fates become connected but not woven so tightly that they can’t be separated.

We can convince ourselves that we are needed. Others may convince themselves that without us they cannot succeed. This is an issue of perception. As a long time guild and raid leader I’ve discovered that few players are actually needed. Wanted, appreciated, and preferred for sure. Needed? No. This is a matter of ego. The sad truth is that in raiding most everyone is replaceable. If a group as a whole is serious about moving forward or keeping their way of life together they’ll get by without us. If your leaving causes everything to fail at once it isn’t really you. You were the catalyst that gives everyone else the courage to go as well. It isn’t uncommon for a bunch of people to do the same thing over and over again because they’re just waiting for someone to lead the charge to leave. At the same time, is this perception of need really that bad? Why is it viewed so negatively? Yes, we do surrender a bit of our personal choice and freedom but there is so much to gain by doing so. That is where I truly feel Eliot missed out.

Social Bonds

Raiding together is an opportunity to build real social bonds. Contrary to what a lot of players may believe there are actual people playing the characters you see in your MMORPG. These are not puppets with disembodied voices that exist for our amusement. They are not devices by which we get to further our own ends. Eliot recognizes this: “You get to know the people you’re raiding with. You develop in-jokes. Like any group of people working toward a common competitive goal, your group becomes part of your identity.” That recognition seems to get lost somewhere, however, as he also says, “Yet you can’t just leave because people are relying on your presence, people with whom you share laughter and friendship and triumphs and even defeats. These are your friends, at least in your mind, and you don’t want to let them down.”

This is where I break completely from the argument. These are your friends, at least in your mind. If you’re in a guild where that situation is true than I feel sorry for you. Either you’ve found a rotten group of people or you’re actively trying to keep folks at arms length. Iniquity is a small guild of 30 individuals and their families. We’ve been together for years. They are my friends, not in my mind, but in reality and of that I have no doubt. I have met over half of them in real life multiple times. We have shared both horrible and good times together in and out of our game. Our lives, our whole lives, blend into the guild we call Iniquity. That is the defining reason of why we carry on when we might not enjoy the MMORPG as much as we used to. Eliot makes the point, “Any novelty has long since been wrung out, the challenge is gone, and the only thing that’s left is just an incessant sense of being needed.” That is a sad state to be in. I don’t always want to do the same raid we’ve done for the last three months in Rift. I certainly don’t need any drops off a lot of the bosses. Do I go because I feel an incessant sense of need? Absolutely not because that makes us sound like we’re taking pity on the group of people we call friends. They are weak and lost without us. That is rubbish. I go on because I want to play a game, any game, with my friends. My life is better because of my guild and that is not a delusion.

The real lesson

The lesson Eliot brings out of this discussion is that developers need to offer players choices in how to progress. I believe we should always have choice but I think this is a naive view. Raiding, crafting, PvP, and any other choice a developer will offer you is going to fall into the exact same trap that has been described in the Massively article. The activity doesn’t matter. The real lesson is that as long as you play for yourself you will always end up being a “horrible person.” As long as you’re only concerned about your progression, your character, your fun, you will eventually hit a point where you feel as Eliot did. If you want the true lesson here (and in life) it is simple: learn to take joy in the joy of others and make your own happiness. I play MMORPGs to play with my friends. We log on for each other’s company first. The raid, the loot, the progression, the glory, and any other choice a developer can give me comes second. Make your own fun people because no developer (or any other human being) can do it for you.